Give a Dog a Bone

Barry seen here on MY SIDE of the bed. He's lucky he's cute.

One of Barry's favorite things is a bone (and our bed). He really gets down on those things (the bone, not our bed). We buy him new bones occasionally with good meaty bits on the outside and juicy marrow on the inside. After a pet training session one evening I bought him a new bone. I decided I'd give it to him Monday morning. I'd give him his KONG and then leave the new bone by the door for him right before leaving so he'd have an extra treat! How fun for a Monday! Great idea! NOT.

The following occurrences are all my fault. I am guilty of the crime and acted alone. My husband was an innocent bystander. In a desperate plea for leniency, here is my account of my harrowing offense, and my sincerest apologies to both my husband and my dog. --To be read in the style of Film Noir --

It started out as an unusually cold January morning. In fact the news was calling it 'The Polar Vortex Part II'. Many businesses and schools were forced to close due to the dangerously cold wind temperatures of around -30 degrees fahrenheit. Otherwise our morning started out as normal. However, it being a Monday, our outlook was slightly more grim than usual. We got ready for work knowing our places of employment wouldn't have the guts to close down in order to protect it's employees from certain doom.

Later that evening Husband arrived home to find that our dog, Barry, had left a deposit of excrement in the back room. When I arrived home he was cleaning up the evidence, not knowing what I had done was pre meditated. He saw the dog bone and the pieces that had fallen off but didn't realize my motive was intentional. Eventually I spilled the beans to him. I'd given Barry a new bone before I left for work and thought it would be a good idea. Husband shook his head in disapproval. Now the pieces were coming together for him.

Husband decided to play with Barry a bit, wear him out, and then take him on a walk. The playtime was going well. Suddenly, Barry stopped and relieved himself on the carpet. What we didn't know at the time was that Barry was sending a message of his own. He was saying, "I have to take a shit. Please take me out now. The only way I can get you to see this is for me to whizz right here in front of you. You'd rather me whizz than do what I'm about to do to that grassy/snowy knoll outside, trust me." 

Armed with rubber booties, poop bags, treats and coats we headed outdoors into the Polar Vortex. That grassy/snowy knoll never had a chance. It was at that moment we realized the extent of the damage my indifference had created. With my head hung low we trudged through the frigid bone-numbing cold back to the safety of our home. Barry hasn't been the same since.

Film Noir Barry.

That was last Monday. We are still dealing with the ramifications of this. He was better in a couple of days otherwise we'd have taken him to the veterinarian. On that Tuesday morning he pooped right away right outside of the of our building (which he's never done before) but then he strained to poop the rest of the time. It was sad. I am sad. We had to go to work and just hoped that he'd get better. This is the part where I start googling all the possible reasons a dog could poop in the house, pee in the house, have diarrhea and have constipation. I was beside myself about all of this. We deduced that Barry ate the good meaty bits of the bone too fast and it was too greasy and now he was suffering from the rich meat on the bone. My fault. That Tuesday at around noon our dog walker texted us to let us know that Barry had diarrhea in the back room and that she had cleaned it up as best she could. My fault. Husband took off work a little early to take Barry out more frequently (did I mention it was freeeeezing out?). My fault. Husband made him a boiled white rice and boiled chicken meal. Complete with pureed (canned) pumpkin. Barry wasn't really a fan but he didn't say no to it. Wednesday he seemed to be better but still had some loose stool (outside). We also noticed that it seemed he was peeing in the back room. Weird! We cleaned that all up as well as possible with what we had. He seemed nearly back to normal on Wednesday evening. Thursday was another good day. Poop was more solid. There was still that issue of him peeing in the back room, though. I scrubbed and sprayed and sprinkled and vacuumed my heart out. Then on Friday we got a text from the dog walker saying that Barry pooped in the back room. She mentioned that it wasn't really diarrhea. Ummm... Was he still sick?? Or was he just using the bathroom in the back room at will? We had the idea that since he peed and poo'd in the back room the first couple of times due to being sick now he smells that and just uses that back room as his playground/bathroom. GREAT. Also my fault. It would never have happened in the first place if it weren't for me giving him that damn bone.

Barry is pouting on the floor by himself. He knows something isn't right
and he's feeling down.

We were advised to pick up something called Nature's Miracle which eats the 'bathroom' smell. Unfortunately we had to go on a trip to Husband's home town due to an unforeseen family emergency on Friday and brought Barry along to Husband's mother's house. Barry's grandma's house. We decided that if he had an accident at her house then we'd take him to the vet right away. If not then, well, that means he was using the back room as his playground/bathroom and we'd need to clean the shit out of it. Literally. Turned out he didn't have any accidents at Grandma's house.

We used Nature's Miracle on Sunday night and saturated the areas we thought he went. We did our best to locate the spots. We used the crawl-on-your-hands-&-knees-feeling-the-carpet-&-sniffing-your-fingers method. Actually, this is a good method. If you are unable to catch your animal in the act then this will help you locate the 'spots'. Especially if it's hours (days in our case) later and the carpet is now mostly dry.

So, anyway... this miracle product hasn't yet stopped Barry from peeing in the back room. Monday after work and Tuesday I came home to peed-on carpet. I will cut the product itself some slack. The directions say to saturate the area, let sit for 5 minutes, dab up excess moisture then allow to dry COMPLETELY for all urine/feces scent to be totally gone. I am not sure that the spots have had a chance to dry completely each day. So this weekend we'll re saturate all the spots in the back room and we'll have enough time to allow them to dry completely. I have a good feeling Barry won't use the bathroom in the back room when we're there. Hopefully by then, he'll stop using the bathroom in the back room.